The Unforgettable Cowboy in Black

“Hi, I’m –”

“Jeff.”

“Uh… Yeah. How did you know? Have we met?” said Jeff. His mind raced to search its memory banks but kept coming up with nothing to tell him the identity of this cowboy hat-wearing man in all black, who was sitting at the table where Jeff left his laptop and coffee so he could go pee in the restroom of the crowded coffee shop.

“We have,” sighed the cowboy in black. “Best not to think about too much. Just have a seat. I won’t bother you.” He raised his copy of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass back to his face and continued to read.

Jeff slid into the chair across the small coffee shop table from the cowboy in black. He stared, analyzing the cowboy, and picked up his coffee to take a sip.

“It is rude to stare,” said the cowboy in black, not taking his eyes off of his book.

Jeff leaned forward and said, “Am I losing it? I really have no clue who you are, and you being so calm about this whole situation – quite frankly – is just making it weirder.”

The cowboy in black looked up from his book. He closed the book, placed it on the table, and said, “Don’t forget to mention my getup. You find that weird, too.”

Shaking his head, Jeff replied, “I do and I’m dying for you to tell me how you know that.”

Leaning back in his chair, the cowboy in black picked up his coffee and took a sip. While returning his coffee to the table, Jeff could see that it had the name “Dale” written on it by a barista. The cowboy said, “You don’t remember me because people don’t remember me outside a ten-foot radius. It was a curse put on me by a witch.”

“Oh, yeah. Of course,” replied Jeff in an exaggerated way. “I must have forgotten that.”

The cowboy in black grinned and said, “If you don’t believe me, then don’t believe me, but can I enjoy my book and my coffee without a bother?”

Jeff looked to his right and saw a pretty young woman with red hair waiting near the counter for her order. He said, “Excuse me, ma’am.” The girl flinched but did not turn around. “Ma’am. Excuse me.” This time the girl didn’t even have the decency to flinch. “Red, if I may have a moment of your time over here,” Jeff said, a bit louder than before, and it caused curious stares from other coffee shop patrons and some baristas.

The pretty redhead turned around and took some cautious steps toward the table where Jeff and the cowboy in black sat. She stopped walking, far enough to be out of arm’s length from either of the gentlemen that sat there. She then said in an assault, “I have a boyfriend, okay. And so you know, girls don’t like being catcalled or called over like dogs. So, if you could not, I’d appreciate it. Thanks.”

Jeff, throwing a hand up as if to calm a wild beast, replied, ”Take it easy. Take it easy. That’s not what this is. I just would appreciate your help with something.”

“Let me guess,” said the pretty redhead. “It’s in your pants?”

A concerned and confused look came onto Jeff’s face, and he replied, “What happened to you?... No.” Pointing to the cowboy in black sitting across from him, he continued, “You see this gentleman?”

The pretty redhead, not calming down an ounce, took a quick look at the cowboy, and said back to Jeff, “Of course I see him.”

To the cowboy in black Jeff said, “Would you mind telling her your name?”

“Name’s Dale, ma’am,” said the cowboy in black, extending a hand to the pretty redhead. She froze and took a moment to really look at the cowboy, admiring his rugged handsome features.

“Hi. I’m Patricia,” said the pretty redhead, the pitch of her voice rising. She grabbed the cowboy’s hand lightly, preparing for a shake, but he gently pulled her closer and kissed the back of her hand. The pretty redhead blushed and took a moment to retrieve her had after the cowboy let it go. “I like your hat,” she said with a smile and a tilt of her head. “You don’t see many cowboys here in New York.”

“We usually come out at midnight,” replied the cowboy in black.

“Patricia!” shouted a barista holding up a coffee at the counter.

“Perfect!” said Jeff. He looked at the pretty redhead and said, “Now go get your coffee and come back.”

The pretty redhead shot Jeff a dirty look. She turned to the cowboy in black and put on a more friendly demeanor to say, “I’ll be right back.”

“Sure you will,” said the cowboy, and the pretty redhead walked off to get her coffee. Once she grabbed her coffee, the pretty redhead walked back to the table with no trace of the friendly demeanor she had left with.

“I’m back. What did you want?” said the pretty redhead to Jeff.

“Alright, my friend here,” said Jeff, holding a hand out to display the cowboy in black. “What’s his name?”

“How am I supposed to know? I’ve never seen him before,” said the pretty redhead. Jeff, mouth hanging open in shock, stared at the cowboy in black. “Just messing with you, dude,” continued the pretty redhead to Jeff, “Dale’s my boyfriend.”